A Different Kind of Fraternity

When it comes to fraternity culture, stereotypes are abundant. The same goes for gay men. So what happens when you combine the two? A breakdown of conventions resulting in Delta Lambda Phi, a national social fraternity for gay, bisexual and progressive men.

A flyer promoting DLP | Credit: Arturo Mendoza

For the past year, a group of about 10 students have been working on starting a chapter of Delta Lambda Phi (DLP) at Boston University.

“We want to be a safe place where people can be proud of whatever you are,” said Ethan Pravetz, founder and president of the DLP interest group.

The Origins

Pravetz said he first heard about the fraternity  last spring through his teaching fellow, Jon Dobres,who was a member of the Boston-wide chapter of Delta Lambda Phi. The former DLP chapter, Alpha Chi, was composed of students from several Boston area colleges and existed from 2000 to 2007.

When Pravetz returned to school in the fall, he started an interest group for DLP, the first of many steps necessary to become a recognized chapter, and recruited from Spectrum and the Marsh Chapel’s Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender and Questioning group.

Adam Johnson, the vice-president of DLP’s interest group, heard Pravetz’s pitch at a Spectrum meeting and “was immediately taken with the idea,” despite his previous notions of what it meant to be a fraternity brother.

“I never really thought about joining a fraternity. I was disillusioned by the stereotype,” said Johnson.

Pravetz said he also was never interested in joining Greek life. “It’s very hetero-dominated and off-putting,” he said.

However, Boston University fraternities do not necessarily fit the stereotype of a funnel-chugging, backwards-baseball hat wearing, girl-groping bro, they said.

“We think the Greek life system is positive and we want more people to be encouraged to join it,” said Pravetz.

Arturo Mendoza, also a DLP interest group member, said that he rushed for another fraternity on campus, Kappa Sigma, the spring of his freshman year but found that it was not a good fit.

All About the Equality

While DLP may become known as “the gay frat”, Pravetz said they would accept straight members as well.

“We know our frat appeals more to the LGBT community, that’s the intention, but we don’t want to deter anyone who wants to join.”They would also want to have mixers with other fraternities and sororities and be active in community service events, which they do not want to limit to only the gay community, Pravetz said.

“It’s about equality, more than activism,” Pravetz said.

Delta Lambda Phi Crest

There is also the issue unique to a gay fraternity of brothers getting sexually or romantically involved with each other.

“Among the things that might run through someone’s head when they hear about a gay frat is, ‘It’s going to be a harem. It’s going to be a breeding ground for drama. That’s a hard stereotype to get past,”‘ Pravetz said.

The national organization does have a “hands-off” policy which states that brothers cannot be involved in any type of romantic relationship with pledges in order to keep the pledging process democratic, but there is no regulation about brothers having a relationship with each other.

“We might be attracted to one another, but that is one issue that we are going to have to deal with,” Mendoza said.

They have already dealt somewhat with this issue when a couple  that was in the interest group broke up, Pravetz said. However, both students decided to come back and continue involvement with DLP.

The First Push

Establishing a presence and a chapter on campus has been a difficult process and has included a fair share of setbacks, Pravetz and Johnson said.

Despite BU’s large gay community, recruiting students has especially been a challenge, Pravetz said. They created fliers, branding DLP as “not your average fraternity” and posted them everywhere on campus, Mendoza said, but there was not much of a response.

“When I talk to people about it, they don’t know if it’s going to be successful,” said Pravetz. “We’re trying to get rid of the concept in people’s minds that ‘we can’t do this'”.

A huge blow also came when their application to be recognized as a colony by the national organization was denied because the paperwork was filed incorrectly, Pravetz said. They are filing a second colony petition at the end of this semester, which would allow the group to start having rushes and pledges for three semesters before they can become a recognized chapter.

“At times we got a little ahead of ourselves. We thought we could become a fraternity overnight,” said Mendoza.

While the process is taking longer, creating a DLP chapter would provide immeasurable support in the gay community, DLP members said.

“It’s not just about us, it’s about all the men that we want to make this for. It really is something that can become a fixture,” Pravetz said. “We want to play the game too.”

About Heather Vandenengel

Heather Vandenengel (CAS '11) is a campus writer for the Quad.

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