Foxy Congressperson of the Week: Rep. Mike Grimm

You can totally imagine him tricking mobsters into divulging their deepest secrets, right? Photo Public Domain through Wikimedia Commons.

Before I move on to my usual hard-hitting profile of one of the nations most attractive congresspeople, it is my sad duty to inform you that this will be the last installment of Foxy Congressperson of the Week. As I’m sure you all have noticed, BU has billed your student account and apartment leases start in less than a month. Sweet summer is coming to an end, and with it goes my Washington internship and proximity to federal legislators.

This is probably for the best, though, because I was quickly reaching the end of my rope on truly foxy legislators. We were going to have to start moving on to people who, while not actually attractive, also do not bear a striking resemblance to amphibious creatures (I can’t be the only one who thinks Mitch McConnell looks like a turtle, right?).

I decided to go out with a bang this week and honor the first foxy congressperson who also has a ridiculous nickname. Representative Mike Grimm of Staten Island is known as Mikey Suits to many of his constituents. If that sounds like a mobster moniker, that might be because Mr. Suits worked as an undercover FBI agent, investigating the Gotti family. The nickname refers to the three-piece suits he used to wear. This was after he served in the Marines. Oh, and he has mesmerizingly blue eyes. So if you have your list of Things That Make Politicians Foxy in front of you, you can just go ahead and check all the items off.

Despite his undisputable foxiness, Mr. Grimm’s resumé of hotness is not without its drawbacks. He was reportedly the subject of an internal investigation for an incident at a nightclub in which he drew his gun. I’m as anti-nightclub-shooting as the next girl, and I’ve never fully understood the allure of the bad-guy persona, but I can say almost for certain that there are plenty of people out there who would be at least as turned on by someone who had been investigated by the FBI as someone who hadn’t.

Rep. Grimm’s office is on the 5th floor of Cannon (which, in my informal survey, is the most attractive House office building). His hallway honestly looked a little too much like an abandoned mental hospital for my liking. When I walked in the door I was greeted by an adorable, tiny dog named Sebastian, who belongs to the Congressman. The puppy was extremely friendly and appeared to have free reign of the office, which I found extremely cute, but which probably would have annoyed me if I had worked there. I gave the certificate to the woman working at the front desk, who assured me that the Congressman would be very amused by my award. She gave me a business card for the press staffer, I said goodbye and started to walk out the door. And then – this is the good part – I saw her actually walk into someone’s office and show them the certificate! This is the first evidence I have ever had that the painstakingly prepared awards go anywhere but the recycling bin, and it was pretty exciting.

And with that, my foray into Congressional stalking came to an end. Despite the fact that the recipients of the Foxy Congress award resolutely ignored my recognition of their astounding accomplishments in foxiness, I think we can call the experiment a success. If only because we discovered that there are actually foxy congresspeople. Who knew?

About Annie White

Annie is a senior in CAS studying political science.

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