BU TweetCreep: February 19th – February 24th

Lots of really terrible news has come out of BU this week. And frankly, I’m not going to talk about them because this is not the proper format and anything I say would come across as insensitive just because the nature of this article is generally so sarcastic.

But… I’m still going to talk about something terrible. Really terrible. The Hunger Games: BU Edition.

That’s right. It’s like the next zombie apocalypse, and I feel compelled to prepare in advance. What if Dean Elmore decides he is going to crack the whip on campus? Show us who is boss? He shuts down all the dining halls, disbands all student groups and even renames Silber Way, Elmore Way? Then, he takes a person from each school and makes them fight to the death? What will you do?

Me? I’m a runner. I run from conflict and would probably be a terrible shot with a bow anyways. Therefore, I would hide. In floor 2 1/2 in SED. And I would wait. Until dawn. When the other students think it is safe to sleep. The night has passed. But… I wouldn’t kill them. No. I would run to Shaws and steal all the food and bring it back to my hiding spot on floor 2 1/2 and wait it out. Then! Then it would be down to me and the last student. They would think they won, but then Evil Dictator Elmore would inform him/her that there was one student remaining (me). The last player would search and search and grow hungry. They would go into Shaws but alas! No food! (I stole it all, remember?) Then they would stave, and I would win! Hooray!

But that’s just me, the coward. The COM Coward. If you were elected to a Hunger Games and represented your school, how would you win? SMG student, I already know the answer. You would win the old fashioned way. By slitting all of our throats.

And with that charming image… On to the tweets!

 

RACHEL AND FINN ARE DOING WHAT?!

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/PCatBU/status/172710828515143680″]

AKA by next week we will have actually come up with a name for the event. After we catch up on GLEE, of course. I heard this week’s episode is is a real doozy. What I’m trying to say is, we’re busy people.

WHO SAYS WE’RE ENTITLED?

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/BUDiningService/status/172461487867166721″]

You’d give West Campus waiter service after they tried to organize a boycott Fall Semester? (Yeah. I haven’t forgotten you, whiney froshies.) Plus, everyone knows that the StuVis are where anyone who is anyone on campus lives.

BE MORE SPECIFIC WITH ‘LIGHTLY USED’…

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/BUPanhel/status/172505745928097794″]

NOTE: Those little teddies you ladies bought for Valentine’s this year aren’t pajamas.

WHY MUST IT ALWAYS BE LIKE THIS @BOSTONUNIVNEWS?

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/BostonUnivNews/status/172438468331450368″]

Oh, hey! Our own school hates us! #fun

SPOILER ALERT: BEST JOKE IN THIS ARTICLE

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/PRLab_BU/status/172419288299343872″]

That sounds like the best idea since the Zune.

POLITICS ARE SEXY

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/BostonUNews/status/172362672329850880″]

Based on the number of kids he has, I’d say he has tremendous staying power. #OhSnap #SeeWhatIDidThere

MORE SEX JOKES

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/VagMo2012/status/172738592878231552″]

And in case you thought that sex-related joke was inappropriate, here is @VagMo2012 to prove to you that’s exactly what you hooligans want/appreciate.

SALESMEN OR SIRENS ON THE ROCKS?

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/UmojaBU/status/172011113557409793″]

Unfortunate placement. No one can compete with them. It’s like if you set up a lemonade stand next to… an even bigger lemonade stand. Where the lemonade was made by puppies.

#HELP

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/BU_CCD/status/172033624676376576″]

Wait… “your mother’s couch” didn’t make the list. There go all of my life plans…

I TEASE YOU BECAUSE I’M SECRETLY JEALOUS OF YOUR ACCOUNT

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/BUDiningService/status/172895724948828161″]

Okay, @BUDiningServices, don’t jump the gun. He obviously wasn’t talking to you. He said he “had the meal of his dreams” not “had cereal for dinner… again.”

I MIGHT ACTUALLY LOOK THAT UP…

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/VagMo2012/status/172738924207292416″]

You should go to that show. Especially if you’re not deaf, so that you can learn how to sign “vagina”.

About Liz Breen

I write TweetCreep. And drink highly caffeinated drinks. Sometimes, I do both at the same time. @beinglizbreen

View all posts by Liz Breen →

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