Last night’s Top Chef was gosh-darn suspenseful, as we got down to the wire with the final five chefs. I am, of course, using only the cleanest language to make up for the expletives I shouted at my TV for the ending of this episode. But more about that later…
Last night’s episode started with Tiffany reminding us that she was sent home last season in the final five. Foreshadowing, perhaps? We shall see.
For the Quickfire, the cheftestants had to cook on the Ellis Island ferry, using only what was available at the snack bar, and only in the time it took the ferry to get to Ellis Island–so the chefs had to just kind of guess what their time situation was.
The guest judge for the Quickfire (and subsequent elimination challenge) was local food pioneer, Dan Barber. Blais made a hot dog banh mi, cooked in a military MRE bag, which boils water, that he just happens to always carry in his knife kit. Tiffany made nachos, because all the ingredients for nachos were in the snack bar. Since she realized it was too simple, she also made popcorn with dried fruit. So complex! Antonia made grilled cheese using parts of other sandwiches and grilled it on a hot dog roller, while Carla made orange and papaya salad. Now, Mike, he made cheese soup thickened with hot dog rolls. I’m not a doctor, but I’m pretty sure that is literally vomit.
Carla won, at the behest of Blais who lamented that she just cut up some oranges. But the chefs stayed on Ellis Island (which suddenly became night) to hear of their elimination challenge. They each had to create a dish based on their heritage, and for inspiration, they were given dossiers on their family history, and their loved ones came to visit!
Tiffany decided she wanted to make okra, even though Tom is very vocal about how much he hates it. Oh, and Mike and Antonia found out that they’re distantly related (because they’re both Italian!), and they didn’t shut up about it for the rest of the episode.
So Mike made pork ragu with gnocchi, Antonia made braised veal with risotto, Tiffany made short ribs with mustard greens and okra, Carla made pork shoulder with grits and biscuits, and Blais made steak with bone marrow and glassworts (which are sea beans, that’s just what he called them because he’s Irish!).
The judges loved everything. EVERYTHING! But whenever someone suggested they shouldn’t eliminate anyone, they brushed off the idea.
Antonia won, and with it she got a new car (The car challenge seems to be getting earlier every season)! Mike was announced as safe, and then Richard was told to pack his knives…and go to the Bahamas, because that’s the location for the finale! I screamed and cursed at the screen at that point.
Don’t do that to me, Top Chef!
Then there was a long commercial break, and Padma announced that in fact, no one was being eliminated, and everyone would go to the bahamas! Needless to say, I was annoyed and short of breath thanks to hyperventilating. Either way, based on the preview, next week is sure to be a doozy!
