Welcome to the BU Quad’s live blog of the Super Bowl. As our wonderful host (and die-hard Pats fan) , Julia Butler has put it, “It is Armagedeon.” The match-up–New York Giants vs New England Patriots. Re-match. Chris Walker, our resident sports man, and Allan Lasser, who still thinks he’s watching baseball, are following the 46th Superbowl.
Allan: Patriots won the coin toss and something just happened. This is The Quad’s live blog. Hi, welcome. Happy Superbowl.
Chris: Giants start with the ball and have only recently gotten down field, but have been stuff at the 40 yard line, so they have to punt.
Allan: He aimed for the ground on that one. Either a bad throw or bullshit, according to some football fans.
Chris: After the safety/terribel call, the giants are up 2-0 and currently have the ball at the 35 yard line on 2nd down.
Allan: That player’s name is Bear. Or Bare. Either way, I wish bears played football.
Allan: Where’s all the vuvuzelas?
Chris: First, fact: vuvuzelas are banned at most NFL stadiums. Very sad fact. Just like the Giants are now up 9-0 thanks to a Victor Cruz 2 yard touchdown. Now the Pats are up and need to make it happen.
Allan: I found a real video of bears playing football. Also, as a bonus, here’s bears playing hockey.
Chris: Wes Welker gets the Pats another first down which is woefully wasted on a run, with 50 seconds in the first quarter.
Chris: also, polar bears can show the most dominance.
Allan: BATTLESHIP COMMERCIAL. They didn’t say “They sunk our battleship!” so I hate it.
Chris: GET IT TOGETHER BRADY!!!!!!!!! 9-3 Giants ball
Allan: The guy who just caught the ball in the end zone Tebowed. T-boned?
Allan: A GE/Budwiser commercial where the guy says “turbines” like “turbans.”
Chris: First, very sad I missed that commercial. Second, Giants TE Beckum may have gone down with a knee injury after colliding with a Pats d-lineman, on what could have been a possible fumble. 2nd down Giants ball.
Allan: What’s a d-lineman? Some sort of d-list football player? The Kathy Griffin of football players?
Chris: A d-lineman is a defensive player who directly opposes the offensive lineman and tries to sack the quarterback more at amore direct position. Pats ball, 2nd down, 20 yard line and the Kathy Griffin of football players are the 2nd string kickers. trust me.
Chris: The Giants turn the ball over after wide receiver Mario Manningham bobbles the ball on a long play for a first down. Pats ball.
Allan: Just a heads up everyone, I thought I was invited over for a “Super Smash Brawl” party. I’m still a little sour about it.
Allan: I saw the aerial shot of the stadium—that thing is all indoors! That’s so much ceiling.
Chris: Remind you to tell you about Super Cash Bros. later. And the Pats are putting together some solid moves down field, with 65 seconds left.
Allan: I just saw the a picture of the trophy they win. It’s not even a bowl!
Chris: TOUCHDOWN!!!!! Brady throws a bullet to Danny Woodhead, to take the score to 10-9.
Allan: Everyone was screaming and nothing scary even happened what is this
Chris: Halftime, and Madonna is about to perform but who actually cares? Pats are up by a point and the the tension is going to stay tight all night.
Allan: Time for the super time show. Madonna’s gonna sing “Like a Virgin” and Tebow will run out on stage.
Allan: Dean Elmore, I mean, Cee-Lo Green is wearing a black bejeweled robe. He looks like the flyest judge in the country.
Chris: Dear Madonna, I am so very sorry for my recent disrespectful remarks about your image. Except for LMFAO, you threw it down. Thank you. 2nd Half coming up next.
Allan: NBC just advertised the Superbowl during the Superbowl.
Allan: Dude with the dreadlocks just put the team on his back
Chris: Aaron Hernandez scores a 12 yard touchdown, sending our host Ms. Butler into epic screams and puts the Pats up 17-9.
Chris: Sterling Moore lays out Mario Manningham, forcing the Giants into a field goal. The score is now 17-12.
Allan: This is violent. Why wasn’t Madonna tackled during the Supertime show?
Allan: Can’t wait until one of these teams put flubber on their shoes to win the game
Chris: The Giants are on the 10 yrd line in scoring position and choose to run it for no real reason, even with three open options.
Chris: Manning gets sacked at the 15, forcing another field goal. Score is now 17-15, Pats ball.
Allan: Patriots are winning but everyone here is still stressed I don’t understand anything
Allan: The Giants steal the ball from the Patriots and get to keep it?! Football IS the American sport. #occupyFootball
Allan: Ninkomvich just got a flag for nincompoopery.
Allan: Fourth quarter, 11 minutes until Boston erupts in drunken riots.
Chris: RIOTSSSSSSSS
Chris: Mario Manningham complains for interference after Sterling Moore bats the ball away, leading to another Giants turnover.
Allan: I’m honestly surprised that people are not drawing hairy penises all over that yellow scribbly football thing.
Chris: Pats pull the old school trick play, with the double backpass flick, to Wes Welker to get the first down.
Allan: Pats marching down the field, picking up yardage with some solid first-down pickups. Sick spiral on that toss. Real talk.
Allan: The guy just dropped the pass that would’ve been important.
Chris: Pats turn the ball over after two failed pass attempts with one pass being clear interference, no call.
Chris: Manning throws a missile to Manningham, on the sideline, getting the G-men a first down, but is being questioned for possession
Chris: Never mind–it was clean.
Chris: going into the 2 minute warning, the Giants are at the 18 yard line. All of Boston just became really quiet.
Allan: Actually, there’s been a lot less ass slapping than I thought. Their pants are tight.
Allan: There’s a fine line between Shakespeare actors and football players. Colorful tights all around.
Chris: True that Allan. The Giants score on the touchdown they didn’t want, through a Brandon Jacobs touchdown. After a failed 2 point conversion, the score is 21-17, Giants ahead. Patriots have the ball at the 20 yard line and 57 seconds left.
Chris: Dropped pass by Branch.
Chris: Hernandez drops what could have been a first down.
Allan: I can tell it’s serious because everyone is either silent or screaming.
Chris: Pats get the first down, Brady goes the hail mary, but the Giants had too many players on the field.
Allan: Game over. Thanks for reading and watching everyone, hope your spirit wasn’t crushed into oblivion.
Chris: Game over, after Tom Brady tried to put up the hail mary. I want to thank all of you for reading and for the Patriots for giving us a great season. You guys put in work. Side note–what world do we live in where Eli Manning has more championships than Peyton? That shit cray.
