BU TweetCreep Feb. 17-23

It’s midterm season Lordes and lads and ladies. I’m personally celebrating by pretending it’s not happening and instead attempting to slowly suffocate myself in other extraneous responsibilities! I made latkes!

Here’s the Creep though:

Monday was **Presidents’ Day** which meant sleeping in and goofing off for us and Twitter war for the Associated Press and Merriam-Webster. 

Then Tuesday was a Monday schedule but my Tuesday class was cancelled SO I GOT ANOTHER DAY TO SLEEP IN. If you also got another day to sleep in, feel free to tweet that @carlysitrin #IAlsoHadAnotherDayToSleepIn #pillow.

Also it was hyper nice out this week which meant everyone was serving some pavement-pounding flip flops and Comm Ave cargo shorts realness.

In grown-up news:

7. New. PLANETS. Also this Uproxx article is basically just TweetCreep space edition. Does anyone have a contact there I could pass my resume along to? [Psst, if anyone gets my contact joke pls come to my home and kidnap me and take me on a cruise to the Bermuda triangle.]

Our president, Coco Montrese-impersonator-in-chief, snatched back protections for trans students.

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And the Washington Post got a SICK new tagline. If TweetCreep had a motto it would be

TweetCreep: The Stream of Consciousness Newsletter No One Asked For But 4 People Enjoy

 

YAY TIME 2 TWEET!!!

 

So they went on the internet? Look I can do it too: here’s a website suggestion, less text more MySpace profile songs. Idk what an SM post is. But I could probably Google it. Gotta heart the worldwide web!

I know, I know it’s scary. It’s like “ahh my friends are so weird” but honestly you have to give them a chance! And I know what you’re thinking: “My friends are all so mega tall and thin they make me look bad” blah blah blah repeat after me: you. are. beautiful. You can’t let irrational self-consciousness stand in the way of your god-given right to travel! Don’t even try to make those excuses you always make, like “going through airport security takes so long because my friends are faceless men in suits and their back tentacles always get caught in the X-ray machine.” Just put those thoughts out of your head already! Don’t be afraid to travel with your friends!

Omg look at his tiny lil professor hands! Does he hold tiny lil pens in those hands to grade tiny lil midterms? Does he have a tiny lil coat with tiny lil elbow patches? I LOVE SQUIRREL PROFESSOR!!!!

What? Like a field trip to the zoo? I get what he’s going for but, honestly oof. Rethink that phrasing bud.

What to do when it sounds like people at your new job–where you are lucky to have been hired right out of school–spend all day completing important tasks for which they are paid. #TerrierTips for new employees who want to sleep in, leave early, and GET. THAT. BANK! Why work when you can sit in bed, watch Youtube videos and decay!?

Thank. God.

Wow, that’s a real A to C jump there. “The weather’s getting warmer and you know what that means…pregnancy!” Summer -> heat -> less clothes -> hookups -> babies -> Dance Arts Camp!

IT’S NEVER TOO EARLY TO THINK ABOUT CHILDCARE!!!!!! NOT EVEN IF YOU ARE CURRENTLY A CHILD!!!

Geez, I’ve been doing this stress relief thing all wrong. I’ve been holding my breath until I pass out and wake up in a storage bin in the corner of my room close enough to the radiator that my hair gets singed. Stress is bad. Gotta breathe!

Your gift this week Creeps, some nuggets of wisdom from BU IT of the past. 2011 and 2012 was an era full of money mules and weaponized pdfs. Sigh. I wish someone would hire me as a money mule. Or as anything. I need a job.

That’s it. That’s my everything. Love you. Bye!

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Carly Sitrin

I'm the senior editor of The Quad. Interests include: frogs, backpacks, satire, Adele, and the oxford comma. Tweet me your dreams @carlysitrin.

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