G R E E T I N G S Creepers. Didja miss me? I was real stressed last week with midterms (still?) and assignments and job apps and general tears which I’m sure we can all relate to at this point. Whatever though, glass half full, right? Life goes on and we’re all just slowly decaying holograms in Johnny Damon’s fever dream.
Hope everyone had a glorious #Marmon and are currently having a glorious #4/20blaze! It got brisk again which kinda stinks but it’s supposed to be warm in a few weekends I think. Or not, I can’t remember what my iPhone weather app said. #ForecastIsMurky #FutureUncertain.
This striking profile of our one true Lorde.
— Boston University (@BU_Tweets) April 19, 2017
HELP ALL OF THESE PEOPLE HAVE BEEN STUCK ON THE B.U.S. ALL DAY!!! Look at them, just turning their heads for hours nonstop. The bus never moving, never giving them a chance to exit. Do you think they remember what it’s like outside? YOU HAVE RIGHTS my friends. Also quick PSA, take off your backpacks when you board ok? Say it with me: common. courtesy.
— PRLab (@PRLab_BU) April 12, 2017
Oooooh boy hold on to your hats this is a good one.
a) As anyone who has seen the iconic film Spotlight knows, a spotlight SHEDS LIGHT AND REVEALS TRUTH. Whereas this spotlight appears to be CASTING DARKNESS AND HIDING CLIP ART. Democracy dies in, whatever, you get it.
b) If she’s so good at photoshop why didn’t she just photoshop her face on to Keira Knightley’s everything?
c) WHY *clap* DOES *clap* BUPD *clap* NEED *clap* PHOTOSHOP????? Tweet me your sarcastic suggestions @Carlysitrin.
— BU Public Health (@BUSPH) April 13, 2017
I may be dumb but I know two things. That is not a turtle. The other one is not an animated character from the Disney film “The Lion King.”
Also what the heckin frick is the Talbot Green? Is there some kind of secret garden where middle aged women in khakis hang around with misnamed visitor pups? I feel like I don’t even know this school anymore.
Uh no, his specialty is Balloon Cuts of Meat. You know Brisket Balloon, Chuck Balloon, Boneless Clod Steak Balloon. https://t.co/BZZmFeJtlf
— BU Dining Services (@BUDiningService) April 13, 2017
BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND (AND SUBTWEET) I PRESENT TO YOU, OUR STAR AND SAVIOR: @BUDiningService.
Mmm, clod steak balloon.
Good going Dining Service.
I would legally adopt a freshman if it meant getting swiped in on Brisket Balloon day.
*Chuck Balloon Brunch is the new Lobster Night*
Study abroad panel – In Barcelona, Abby took advantage of BU's reimbursement program for excursions. #BUOpenHouse
— BU Admissions (@ApplyToBU) April 14, 2017
No tea no shade but this is truly the saddest thing you could do while in another country.
Q: How did you spend your semester abroad?
A: Umm you know the usual, taking in the sights, having a transformative experience, filling out endless financial forms. Classic travel stuff.
— BU Pardee Library (@BUpardeelibrary) April 14, 2017
Oooooh! Glowing flag orb! Don’t even care about the words part of this tweet. Loving the orb!
Respect the orb. Worship the orb. God save the orb.
AND NOW, THE SECTION WE’VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR: @BUCasting Corner!
Looking for a male actor (18-25) to star in "The Wrestler." Contact the director to get involved today!
— BU Casting (@BUCasting) April 19, 2017
Hate to break it to you team but Mickey Rourke is 64.
Looking for several actors for "Alone At Last," an experimental short in the style of David Lynch. Contact the… https://t.co/4Nak4Qf3sc
— BU Casting (@BUCasting) April 16, 2017
SEVERAL. ACTORS. FOR. “ALONE AT LAST.”
Is this gonna be like Elephant Man? That’s the only Lynch movie I’ve seen.
Jk I only saw the first three seconds of the trailer. I’m a film buff.
Looking for a male actor (20-40) to star in "Midnight Apartment Dining Room." Contact the director for more… https://t.co/CiZPfenL3A
— BU Casting (@BUCasting) April 18, 2017
All you have to do is sit quietly at a table slowly cutting a steak in the absence of all light. The suspense comes from the proximity of the steak knife to all of your limbs and the knowledge that you can’t see anything. MUST BE A HOT YOUNG MALE but can also be 40. It doesn’t really matter because of the whole “no lights” thing, but an audience will be able to sense if you’re hot or not. Only Michael B. Jordan need apply. Good film, will win awards.
That’s all I’ve got friends! Cheers darlings!