Foxy Congressperson of the Week: Senator John Thune

This week represents Foxy Congressperson of the Week’s first foray into the Senate, with Senator John Thune of South Dakota. Close readers of the Foxy Congressperson series will observe that one hundred percent of the Foxy Congresspeople so far have been from the Midwest. Whether this is a product of my own origins in that oft-maligned region of the country, or the fact that Midwesterners are innately more attractive than people from other parts of the country I know not. But if anyone knows of any foxy congresspeople who don’t hail from rural areas, feel free to offer suggestions so we can insert some geographic diversity into this project.

Senator John Thune would easily be labeled as attractive even by a person who did not think that living in a state with more cows than people was a prerequisite for foxiness. He has what Princess Buttercup would refer to as “eyes like the sea before a storm” and is tan without having to join John Boehner’s Congressional Caucus of Unnaturally Orange Legislators. And all this from a man who graduated from college before I was born! Whatever the male version of a cougar is, he is it. (Mountain lion? Leopard? Help me out, here, folks).

Physical attractiveness aside, this is a guy who not only has children but actually professes to enjoy spending time with them and has yet to be involved in a sex-scandal of any kind. Yes, that noise you just heard was all of The Quad’s female readers swooning. Furthermore, Thune’s Facebook page lists pheasant hunting as one of his main interests. Though holding a gun and firing it at a defenseless animal isn’t usually a barometer of attractiveness, I think it takes a certain amount of confidence for a man to admit that he likes to shoot smalli-ish birds with flamboyant tail feathers as opposed to, for instance, a moose. And we all know how appealing confidence is.

My trip to Thune’s office was my first to the Senate-side of Capitol Hill, and I must say it was a thoroughly enjoyable experience.  Not only was the security guard exceptionally friendly and the building mercilessly easy to negotiate, but the people in Thune’s office were  a treat. When I walked in the front door, both of the women working in the front office greeted me with a smile and a greeting, as did the two constituents who were waiting to meet with a staffer. This in contrast to other federal office buildings I have been to, in which you are lucky if people acknowledge you even when you are making direct eye contact with them.

The woman I gave the Foxy Congressperson certificate wooted and fist pumped when I told her that John Thune was the foxiest legislator anywhere in South Dakota (I didn’t actually check to make sure, but really, how many legislators does South Dakota even have?). This officially qualifies as the best I have received so far. Like some of her fellow staffers-of-foxy-congresspeople before her, she was mostly unsurprised by my showing up at her office and remarking on her boss’ extraordinary good looks. At one point, with a dismissive wave of the hand, she said “Oh, he gets nominated for these things all the time.”

So. In my quest for diversity of recipients, we now have three categories. I am hoping — although I wouldn’t go so far as to say that I am optimistic — that I will be able to find a foxy congressperson who is not from the Midwest, not a republican, and not so assured of their own attractiveness that they don’t even bat an eyelash when someone shows up at their office for no reason other than to tell them they are good looking. Suggestions?