When Dating in College, Live by the Code of Cher

Are you there, Cher? It's me, Sarah (photo by Flickr user MikeyWV)

As an iconic American performer, Cher is a woman known by all. In fact, we know some pretty intimate details about her life. However, very few of us appreciate the sound advice that her melodies and lyrics have to offer. College is a time in our lives when many of us are deeply involved in the dating game. We suffer through multiple break-ups, back-ons and variations of the word ‘commitment’ during our time on the college campus. As dating faux pas occur commonly on college campuses (often, embarrassingly enough, in public places), I offer you the words of Cher to curb your dating mishaps and to help you further enjoy your time in the college dating circuit.

“They say we’re young and we don’t know
We won’t find out until we grow
Well I don’t know if all that’s true
Cause you got me, and baby I got you”

These lyrics from the universally known “I Got You Babe” can teach us a thing or two about budding college relationships. The main thing is that the people around you probably won’t take it seriously at first (and considering the number of college relationships that last all of two weeks who can blame them?). Try to spend your time enjoying your new found romantic company while letting those naysayers remind you that you are still young, so this thing may not be set in stone (as Sonny and Cher weren’t). Enjoy the relationship without taking it or yourself too seriously, “Let’s see what happens” isn’t the worst thing a friend or loved one can say.

“I don’t know why I did the things I did
I don’t know why I said the things I said
Loves like a knife it can cut deep inside
Words are like weapons they wound sometimes.”

Don’t be distracted by the thong and sailors in the video; Cher’s “If I Could Turn Back Time” can teach us to select our words carefully in a disagreement with our significant other as well as to admit when we are wrong. I have seen too many college relationships go through the harsh and pathetic cycle of breaking up and getting back together all in a 24-hour period. This is emotionally taxing and not at all worth the pain and suffering that it can cause. We should all take a look in the mirror when reading this page of the Code of Cher and make a conscious effort to up the level of foresight as well of maturity in all of our collegiate romantic encounters.

“What I am supposed to do
Sit around and wait for you
And I can’t do that
There’s no turning back
I need time to move on
I need love to feel strong
Cause I’ve had time to think it through
And maybe I’m too good for you.”

“Believe,” the club hit, has become a dance anthem for gay men around the world, and rightfully so! But they shouldn’t be the only ones benefiting from what it has to teach! Many a time in college, we will choose to date people within our own group of friends (BAD IDEA right off the bat, but, whatever). This can really complicate a breakup, as it doesn’t allow for the nice clean break that is so helpful in the process of mourning the relationship and then moving on in a timely manner. When we breakup with someone in our social circle we need to prepare ourselves for the moment when they move on (and YES it is entirely possible that they are going to be the first to do so). Don’t be the subject of Cher’s song, BE CHER: end the relationship, move on, and don’t let lingering bitterness get in the way of the happiness that you deserve!

About Sarah Cox

Sarah Cox (CAS '11) writes "Socially Yours," a social manners column, for the Quad. She was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York and is now living full time in Boston. She is studying Art History and hopes to stay on for her masters. One of her goals in life is to one day own a penguin. She would also like to stop dropping the F bomb so much -- class it up a little bit.

View all posts by Sarah Cox →

3 Comments on “When Dating in College, Live by the Code of Cher”

  1. I can’t believe this is a real article. What’s the sequel–Guide to having sex as sung by James Brown? “‘I feel good, I knew that I would’ teaches us that we must go into the sack with the mentality that we will be satisfied, and therefore we will be satisfied. Many times in college people are bad at having sex, but if you have a will for good sex, it will come true!”

  2. I think anyone reading this article has, at some point or another, felt as though a song was written about their own life (although Cher may not always be their artist of choice). We can learn a great deal from songs and artists. They are obviously human and, as such, must get their inspiration from somewhere. What better (or at least convenient) place to get it than their own lives or the lives of those around them? Either way…Shit happens! People breakup. Death happens. We all make mistakes. Don’t discredit someone’s words of wisdom just because they are set to a catchy tune! Listen. You may learn something!

    ps. Maybe if you went into the act of having sex with the mentality that you would be satisfied, you would find a level of happiness Stacy! Sex is as much about the mental as the physical. Take your own advice! You might realize that you can in fact learn from Mr. James Brown.

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